Titles were never my strong suit

So I’ll open up perhaps more than I should and confess that I’ve been feeling more than a little “directionless” of late…and I’m afraid it’s showing in this poor blog. I sign in at least three times a week to tap out posts that will move hearts and wow the world (don’t all bloggers believe, at least a little bit, that at some point their random digital mutterings WILL in fact “light the spark” that makes a difference?), and usually I type two sentences, sigh, highlight, delete, close the browser, move on to something else.

There are days when I wish I could just close the browser on my actual life and start in on something new.

Here’s what I recite to myself every morning as I walk the last fifteen yards to my office: “Somehow, some way, I’m supposed to work out my salvation HERE…TODAY.” Here, in the same office I’ve been in for three years, in a job that’s still challenging and rewarding (regardless of my complaints I know that’s still true), in a city that’s familiar and comfortable now, like a good pair of jeans, surrounded by the same people, living the same life (though the house and roommate situation keeps changing). I don’t suppose the 25-year-old Jesus ever picked up his hammer and set to work for the day thinking with a sigh, “This is fine and whatever, but aren’t I supposed to be saving the world?”

So here’s 25-year-old MB picking up her red pen and preparing for another day of editing, scheduling, paying authors, granting permissions requests, and whatever other tasks may fall across my desk. I don’t get it, and as the days, weeks, months crawl along I get it less and less. But here’s where I’m going to become a saint. Each comma inserted, typo corrected, footnote amended is another step on that straight and narrow path.

And for today, this has to be enough: “Thy word is a lamp unto my feet…” Not a blazing light that illuminates where I’ve been and where I’m going, just a little light that shows me the next step.

Onward and upward.


One thought on “Titles were never my strong suit

  1. I really liked the post Ms. Editor. May I suggest you review one of my favorite books of all time, Dr. Suess’s “Did I Ever Tell You how Lucky You Are?”

    Having been through wonderful times, horrible times, and boring times. I can tell you that the boring times, when you are working on your salavation, while not enliving, are the meat of life. They are when you are expected to accomplish the work that takes work. Those tasks God gives you that do change the world, even if you don’t see it.

    Just remember, others are “much more, oh ever so much more, oh, muchley much-much more unlucky than you!”

    May the Lord be with you on those days when you think there is so much more awaiting you (and every day!).

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