Today was my first last Monday.
I received and accepted a job offer at a newspaper, and I will be leaving my current position at the end of this week. I’ve been with the same company since I graduated from college, so this whole transition thing is very new to me. Mostly I’ve been hoping that if I close my eyes and hold my breath, it’ll all be over when I come back up for air. But the HR woman this morning made it very clear that I still have quite a bit of wrapping up to do. There are letters to write, papers to file, benefits questions to answer, exit interviews to schedule. Who knew leaving a job could involve so much…work?
And then there’s the hardest part: I’ve been making the rounds of the office, pausing in doorways and trying out different segues into the same conversation, but there’s no point in pretending it’s not awkward. Saying goodbye always is, especially when the other person doesn’t know it’s coming.
I have had some terrific colleagues these past four years. Every one of them has been professional, pleasant, and serious about what they do. I’ve learned a lot from them, and I’ve enjoyed it. Leaving that all behind is proving to be a more emotional business than I expected it to be. I’m practicing my stoic face in the mirror, as my hope is not to make a complete fool of myself come closing on Friday. That may just be asking too much.
Still, change and growth are good things. Very good things (in moderation at least). I’m always amazed at the natural element in even the most seemingly clear-cut, professional, business transactions. Uprooting involves a fair amount of discomfort, even in the most professional setting. And I’m sure my new job will fit for the first few weeks like a pair of stiff new shoes–there are bound to be some blisters and interesting noises before we’ve fully broken one another in. But it’s so good to be removed from comfort. I like to feel safe, to feel like I know exactly what I’m doing, to be surrounded by people I know and enjoy. I’ve had all those things for years now. It’s time to be challenged again.
I’m so grateful for the opportunity, just as I’m grateful for everything I have had, everything I’m leaving behind. God is good!